Silent Moves...

Hey Beautiful Souls!

I've been on a hiatus for a while. There has been sooo much going on in my life.

Strong language and content ahead.

So time to spill the tea.....

I have been going through a fucking lot lately! People wonder how I am keeping It all together. Well, news flash I am not. I'm pushing forward and taking it day by day. Goals and ambitions in life is what keeps me afloat. Hence the sage.

In a months span I've had to go through a bunch of new. A bunch of stress, depression, anxiety, and excitement. The former is always a given but I make due.

Now, the first deal. The car that my husband purchased years ago became my car. Which I call " Margaret" (no judgement) has been on her last leg for awhile even before shit hit the fan. Well, one day as I was helping my mother out I heard a loud pop from Margaret. I pulled over and we checked her out. We did what we needed to do and then started off again. After starting to drive again the breaks went out and almost hoped a curb into traffic. Needless to say that shit was scary and it was time to get a new car. I had to find a vehicle fast. I was scrambling. I was stressed. As I saw the car that my husband worked so hard for sitting there that brought back a flood of more emotions. Which brings me to my new baby "Chimi".

Why Chimi, you ask? Well Deadpool! That's right Deadpool no fucks given Deadpool. Chimichangas. I love every thing about it.

Next up, a house. This has been in the works for a good min. I didn't even tell my mother before I found my new home. The whole thing has been an emotional roller coaster. I went into the process knowing as much as I could. This was my husband and I's dream was to own a house.

I had went into this as if it was my husband and I. Reality check from my therapist and self. I have to go into this whole thing for myself. I have to live for myself. Still having him by my side every step of the way, but knowing I am doing this as a step forward for me.

This has been the hardest journey thus far. The realization of everything hit. It hit hard. I've had my panic attacks. I've had my breakdowns. It's a lot. It's a damn lot. I was able to push through with the help of good friends for the process of the mortgage and a very understanding realtor. They were all my MVPs. If it wasn't for them the process could have been a lot worst. So I am very grateful. Forever grateful. I saw my husband on closing and the day I moved in was the most emotional day it was on the 6 month mark.

I am now a homeowner!

Damn.

I smudged my new home and myself to make the energy flow positive. I am believer of energy flowing through life good or bad. Realigning mine and creating a new for my home

Lastly but not least. I adopted a pup! Layla and I both needed a new companion. Roxie will be my emotional support and Layla won't be by herself and she'll have someone to be upset with lol.

I am absolutely in love! I think she's a great match for us both and I hope for many happy years together. Life is moving forward.

With all this being said. Lessons learned . You have to live for you. Strive for a better self. If you need help reach out. You can't do it alone and its good to have people in your corner.

Live in the moment and carry on. Oh and don't take no shit, always speak your mind!

Carrying on. Till next time!